i'm lying naked on my bed

I’m lying naked on my bed because I’m afraid that the dirt on my clothes will contaminate my sacred bedsheets. Also, I really don’t think being in science is helping me with my paranoia.

"Dear Science,

I now know that bacteria can spread like butter on toast in the presence of water, all thanks to my first year in Microbiology."

Damn you Science!

I have lived in New Zealand for four years and have noticed that Kiwis (New Zealanders) walk barefoot around the place; do not rinse detergent off their dishes; wear shoes into their homes and shower one time (or none) a day.

In contrary, I was taught never to wear any footwear into the house and showering three times a day is ritual. I’d have to have a hot shower (to kill those bacteria!) and wear a clean set of pajamas before hopping into bed. I spend my free time with my best friend – the vacuum cleaner, and seeing dust on a shelf will instantly spur in me the need for a major spring cleaning session.

Frankly, my behaviour pisses my mum off. Then again, I think its because it makes me a better housewife than her! Hah!