Adding layers to life

Heather and Jessica edited with lightroom and enhanced with layers

Still on my quest to edit all my sisters wedding photographs, hopefully soon I shall be finished. Luckily she loves me and knows I can still lock her in a cupboard if she annoys me about it. To be fair, she hasn't moaned once about it and has loved the ones I have shown her so far. I just want them to be edited to the best of my abilities and for her to have some lovely photographic memories.
It is a steep steep learning curve, not only taking the photographs, but also the editing. I keep adding new things to my box of tricks, which of course adds on more work, but it is still fun! There is so much to learn and once you make the dreaded mistake of looking at other people photographs, you are doomed.

Heather on the way to the church, edited in lightroom and enhanced with layers

At the moment I am using Lightroom 3 to edit the photographs and then using Picnik.com to add some finsishing touches.
Lightroom Trick - Look into the world of presets! Magical stuff that creates all sorts of cool effects that you can then further tweak.
Picnik.com Trick - If you are premium user you can add 'Layers/textures'. You can also do this using other programs, but I can only do it using Picnik for now!

Wedding Car edited using Lightroom and enhanced with presets

Next time I update the blog about the wedding photography, hopefully I will have bloody finished, but probably not. Let me know what you think and if you have any favourite photograph editing tricks or tips be sure to let me know them.

What lurks beneath

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
Spike Milligan

Next year my wee sister Heather will be marrying a highlander and this means kilts, lots of them. So on one of our recent marathon phone conversations, the sister and I got to talking about photographs and the issue with kilts. As I am the official photographer, it is my job to capture all the moments of the day, that includes the 'kilt' shot. This is the true test of Scottish authenticity, will the kilt wearers be bollocko underneath. If they are, I have to photograph it at some point (why me!). Why does one have to capture this moment? Maybe it is some ancient kilt flashing tradition, where they startle the poor person holding the camera, forcing them to have the image burned into their mind forever and ever, well at least until after all the images have been processed anyways.

Has Heather had any recent proof of this tradition? Well apparently she does and this lead to the infamous 'Penis on the head' tale. I apologise for using the word penis, it is necessary, although I could have used tallywhacker I suppose?
Anyhoo back to the tale....

Heather was at a wedding with her fiance and spotted the wedding guest book. Heather loves to write in these things (pages and pages). The outfit she was wearing meant that she had to kneel down, so she got herself comfortable and started to write...
All of a sudden, a darkness enveloped her and then she felt something on her head (uh oh).
She looks up.. big mistake.
Then as quick as the darkness came, the light was returned and the true horror was revealed.

It turns out one of John's (the fiance's) friends had decided to envelop her head with his kilt and let his penis rest on her head.

This is what I will have to deal with next year.. It may end badly for some.

Please read previous post for more sensible/ sensitive stuff and less penis (as in none at all) - It all floats to the bottom (which has nothing to do with bottoms, honest!)

I want to ride a bicycle and stuff

At the age of 27 I have found myself in the awkward position of not being able to ride a bike, or at least not effectively. How did this tragic event occur?
Firstly the mumborg being in hospital a lot was not conducive to bicycle learning time and the dad had to juggle the siblings, work, mumborg and I. Although I still think they could of squeezed this vital skill in somewhere.
Secondly I never actually got a new shiny bicycle of my own, I got a second hand bmx thing from somebody or other which was a dangerous beast and built for a boy type person.
So things were not looking good for me at all, especially when thirdly I have the coordination skills of somebody with two left feet dancing to the wrong rhythm, backwards and upside down (that bad).
What limited time I did spend riding bicycles was not fun at all, I was too scared to go fast and couldn't get the hang of those wretched gears and brakes. It is not a good idea to put your feet down instead of braking, this can lead to painful and embarrassing situations. Please keep the guffawing to a minimum as you read the rest of this tale.

Whilst on holiday in some lovely part of the country, Suffolk I think, the dad decides we should hire bicycles for the day. At the time I probably thought it was a great idea, it would soon become apparent that it was nothing of the sort.
Picture this, Dad in the lead whizzing round country roads followed by us lot (mum, sisters and me) when he signals that we should all stop. These were one way country roads and sometimes they proved to be rather dangerous. So immediately, instead of applying the brakes, I put my feet down and some how end up on the floor. That was bad enough, but did it end there? Oh no no no. Heather my younger sister had not even learnt to put her feet down to stop, let alone use the brakes. So guess what? She proceeded at speed to ride over my head and down the road until the dad stopped her.
Luckily enough I survived the incident with no injuries, apart from a few cuts. Oh! I nearly forgot to mention the big fuck off tread mark across my forehead! Did I get tea and sympathy? Did I heck as like. It became a family gem of a tale and I don't think I have ridden a bike since. Not that you could really blame me after that horror story.
So what now? Am I resigned to just these two feet of mine? Or do I attempt to mount a two wheeled steed once more? At least I could get a shiny new bike and a big pink helmet ( wow that sounds wrong). Do they do bicycle lessons for buffoons?

I suppose this falls under the category of 'Doing things that could make you look foolish, but you want to anyways' kind of thing.

Other News:

In a recent blog post I requested your votes to send me on a penguin filled adventure. Whilst it it something that I would love to do, it is becoming abundantly clear that I will not be winning. The company will get a shit load of publicity and I will get nothing, so sod that for a lark. I will just have to wait my turn to molest the penguins and build the worlds biggest snowman

Heather the runner over-er has once again started blogging, it will probably last about a week, but you never know. At the moment she needs advice on teapots, teacups and wedding invites, so let the hordes descend on her blog.

Mumborg update: It is always fun in mumborg world. I have lost count how long she has been in this time, month and a half I think. Time flies when you are having fun and all that.

Previously in mumborg world....

Doctor type person: We shall let any infection clear up before/if we operate again.
Mumborg: Okay

Present day in mumborg world:

Doctor type person: Oh it looks like you have an infection, we better operate!
Mumborg: Okay

My opinion on the matter? I have to wonder at the doctor type persons thinking on all things mumborg. I know she is a difficult case, but it is getting increasingly frustrating when they appear to have no clue on how to handle the mumborg. The mumborg manages to stay cheery no matter what, which further proves my theory that she is in fact a clone gone wrong.

Latest news: Awaiting swab results, if there is any infection they will operate.

Happy Jempot Day

I am too lazy creative to just post a birthday card to my lovely sister Jemma, so I have declared it Happy Jempot Day over various social networks. Not that she actually uses anything other than facebook, but I know she will appreciate the gesture or something.

When sisters attack